always the unexpected shock

My friend Liz emailed us a few days ago to tell our friend Steve died unexpectedly in Cabo last week. Steve and Dallas lived in the condo above us the first year we lived in San Jose. They were from Idaho and we used to tease them about being two of the ten Democrats living in their state. We grew to know and love Dallas and Steve during the time we lived in Mexico. They jumped in to help us with Arroyo school without hesitation, buying materials and teaching with us. Steve, who was in his early 60's, had a bad headache one day which Tylenol helped relieve and the following day a blinding headache. Dallas rushed him to the hospital and a cat-scan showed he had an aneurysm. They operated but were unable to save him.

The unexpected is what life is all about, but we never get used to it. We strive for equilibrium of some sort but the reality of constant and unpredictable change is ever present. Sometimes life events can seem as if divine intervention had a hand and sometimes we experience hell on earth. There is no way to predict most of what life hands over for us to deal with. Maybe it's better not to know what is coming next.

Last week, after two months, Harry had all the metal taken out of his jaw and was ecstatic. He also went to the eye doctor last week and learned he was going blind in one eye due to macular degeneration. The doctor said it was a good thing he came in for an exam when he did. He now takes a mega dose of vitamins and minerals everyday to hopefully ward off blindness. My daughter came home to Minneapolis for a short visit last week and spent her time here in bed with a terrible intestinal virus. Some days you just need to turn on the television for a shock if your own life feels temporarily calm. We have all experienced shock as we watch oil destroy the Gulf of Mexico and the lives of people in the gulf region.

My thoughts have been with Dallas the last few days in a very profound personal way. She told Liz she was grateful he did not suffer too much. I cannot imagine her horrendous shock and grief and I know full well I came very close to being where she is now three months ago. Every doctor who saw Harry's injuries said they do not know why he survived such a fall. Sometimes you escape the horrors of life and sometimes you do not. Sometimes there are miracles and other times not. None of it makes any sense. There is one less democrat in Idaho, but one more democrat in heaven. We will miss you Steve with all our hearts.