No excuses!

If you are lucky enough to live long enough, you run out of excuses for not pursuing your passions. I have had a passion for quilting for decades, though I have yet to make a quilt and my history with sewing machines is abysmal. In middle school I hated the sewing classes which, in my day, were compulsory for girls. My home economics teacher, Mrs. Berg, was a real witch, and we girls hated her. I was terrible at sewing and it disappointed my mother terribly (not to mention my husband, for whom I have not sewn on one button in over eleven years). She had always wanted to learn to sew and never had the opportunity. I think she hoped I would love it and be good at it.

The girls who did the best in middle-school sewing class were the girls with mothers who could sew. These girls could screw up in class, take their project home to Mom, and bring the project back looking perfect. I hated them as much as I hated Mrs. Berg. I had to live with my pathetic sewing project, Mrs. Berg's disdain, and my own embarrassment. My mother sent me to private sewing lessons the summer before 9th grade. The teacher was very kind and very good, but I did not find my inner seamstress. This kind and gentle sewing teacher taught me to sew a dress: that turned out pretty well, but I didn't like the dress. I wore it a few times to please my mother and never sewed another stitch for a very long time.

I have slowly begun my journey back to the sewing machine. I took it and a card table down to the hobby room in our building and set up shop next to a lovely window that overlooks the courtyard. Harry has been using this room on a regular basis since we came back from Mexico, creating a variety of shelves for the condo, picture frames, and his very own blackjack table. This table now takes up a big portion of our little library room, so there was no way I could quilt in the space. It turned out to be a good turn of events because the sewing mess is out of sight and the room gives me a nice little feeling of escape. I go down to the "room with a view" in search of creative quilting inspiration. I also took an old boom box down to the space and I love listening to the classical music station on public radio while sewing.

My first efforts at making a little baby quilt for our new granddaughter have been a bit rocky, to say the least. It has become obvious I could use a class and a good teacher. I have read up on quilting techniques and bought a video, but I am lacking in quilting common sense. The kind of sense that sometimes comes only with making mistakes, lots of mistakes. There are several women in our building who quilt beautifully and I know they are ready and willing to help me, especially Ann, just down the hall, who helped me with my granddaughter Eva's mittens at Christmas time.

I am grateful finally to have the opportunity to pursue a dream. I will probably never be really good at quilting, but that fact does not discourage me. My golf game has always been mediocre, but I never let that stand in the way of enjoying golf. Just ask my friend Cindy, with whom I have played many rounds of golf over the years. Early on in my golfing career, about 30 years ago, she told me, "Jeanne, if I had been as bad starting out at golf as you are, I never would have persevered at the game." Cindy, a natural and excellent golfer, used to tell me gently in my darkest moments of frustration, "just keep your head down." That advice always seemed to help and came naturally to me after growing up in an abusive home.

So, I am keeping my head down and learning to quilt! Perseverance, over excuses, sometimes can win the day. Thanks, Cindy!